MOMA’S QUESTION: Does an artist's personality effects our way of thinking about their art?

The morning after the moment that changed my life...

YOUR ART ESCORT'S RESPONSE:

Absolutely … YES. When I first approached art school, I did not like Van Gogh’s art work. I could not figure out why he was so important and why all these other guys were important too. The old cliché, “My kid could paint better that.”

I felt safe enough with this one teacher to tell her how I really felt. She was clearly a mature woman and I was too, going back to school for art around 40ish. Barbara, my teacher explained it’s what we learn about their lives that make us so convicted or compelled to move emotion within ourselves.

Over the next few years I set out on adventure, to reach this point of personal comprehension of why what appears to be sometimes just outright ugly art becomes a master piece.

Where it led me I never thought I would have gone. What I saw and personally experienced during this 2 years period would be so consuming that reading and learning about artists who had suffered seemed my only way out.

During this extended period of HELL, with suicidal ideation, the life stories of other artists was one of my saving grace, and the care taking of my 20 year old to lead my life for me for a while...

It’s sort of funny now that adding then another two years of trying to climb out of hell with multiple therapies and rehabs, the one I wrote my own prescription for… turned out to be the one that has shaped the reconstruction of my new  life.

I became intimate with so many international artists and settled in on my love for the modern art movement as my favorite. The impressionist pieces prior to my illness could not satisfy my hunger or squelch my thirst.

It was the artists’ details of their lives, what made them tick? Why they needed to be driven to paint something that would never sell but they kept doing it. What kept them from the edge of suidice or let them fall to succumb?

Now when I see works that I like, or that are different, weird or just ugly, I research the artist’s life deeper than others to see if I can see what I can find. To see how I may have aligned myself with whom they were expressing themselves to be. 

now are your all wondering what the hell happened to her that she write such crazy nonsense, knowing the depths of hell?

Sept 2006

Informed I have 1 to 3 months before my heart valve blows, 

Oct 15, 2006

Legal divorce is finalized, my little daughter is 5 years old

Nov 6, 2006

Open heart surgery mitral valve repair

Dec 5, 6, 7, 2006

Suffered 3 mini strokes, one each day

Dec 13, 2006

Suffered Ventricular Tachycardia or VTAC for short

Dec - April 2006 Coumadin resistant needing multiple blood draws every week, arm veins scarred and collapsed 

Dec 26, 2006

Entered a multiple year phase of suicidal ideation

Jan 2007

Body Memory Flashback started raging for 9 months

May 2007

Diagnosis of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Nov 2007

Amnesia broke and night terrors started for 6 months

June 2008

The bombing stopped and it was a wait and see

Aug 2008

The first therapy started for stroke rehab. Progress was slow at best

Jan 2011

Chronic Fatigue Immune Disorder was diagnosed and a whole new treatment plan was started

April 2011

Started an experimental drug for my CFS neurological brain virus attacking my auto immune system

June 2011

Registered for a MOMA online course… to help gather, organize and make sense of the past 4 years of my life through other artist’s stories and suffering